The Cowardly Brave New World
by elsupa
Summary: What happens to Earth when the Z fighters are gone? Aleins come for revenge! But who's left to stop them? And do these people actually care to?
1. Chapter 1: The Box

Darkness... and redness.

Everything he could see was tinted red.

How odd.

He reached out his hand, and it immediately struck something.

Looking around harder now, he studied his surroundings better.

The insides a box... of some sort. He hadn't noticed at first because the area near his head was gone.

It was lightly padded, and roomy. But why was he in it?

Unless... it was a coffin...

An urge grabbed him at that thought, and he mashed his arms forward against the top in a panic. Nothing, solid as a rock.

He wheezed, something like claustrophobia was taking him.

Not being able to help himself, he clawed and crawled his way through the tight opening near his head. It was rough, and the jagged edges scratched him and tore into his clothing. He noted that his box was made of metal on the outside, an odd choice for a coffin.

He eventually clambered out onto the floor and quickly turned back and studied his former holdings.

Just as he surmised, it was a large, rectangular metal box. Not a coffin... not a typical one anyway.

He turned toward the large opening in the room, to which he had awoken staring out of. It was cloudy and dark out, though he couldn't see very far. He noticed though, the opening itself wasn't structured, but a large crumbling hole. Turning his attention back to the room, he then noted it was the only opening. No doors, no windows, not even a vent, not that he could make out with his reddened vision anyway.

The room was extremely plain. Nothing at all, save the box, and some machine hooked up to it.

He rose at that and made for the machine at that, suddenly curious.

It was about the size of the box itself, only upright and against the wall. It looked like the box too, all plain save for one point of interest: a dimly lit screen and small assembly of buttons below it. But all it displayed was an error message. Hitting the buttons did nothing, it was frozen.

The man stared back frozen.

What had this machine been responsible for? … It was connected to the box, had it been keeping him in there?

He looked back to the box, and reached down and touched it... a thin layer of dust...

How long had he been here?

He pondered that... and his head burned at the effort.

He clutched his head at that... and that's when he noticed the blood. It was quite sobering.

His forehead was slick with it, and his fingers eventually tracked the source to large scrape on the right of his forehead.

He gasped, shocked at the injury. How had it happened!

The gaping hole in the wall, the jagged opening in the box, the head injury. Something had blasted into here, and very nearly killed him, he realized.

Instead, he had been freed? Awoken, to stare at the night sky with blood filled eyes.

He frowned. Gritting his teeth, he explored the wounded area, determined to find out how bad it was.

Even though it stung bitterly, he could tell that despite being a hell of a gash, it was merely a flesh wound... his brains weren't leaking out at least.

But it was bleeding rather profusely... that could be dangerous... what should he do?

At that thought, something ridiculous happened.

Somewhere inside his head, something comparable to memory started playing. The problem was, it was much more comparable to an instructional video! It was as if a movie had started in his brain, he couldn't remember anything but he was still sure he was experiencing something entirely unnatural.

-"How to apply a bandage to a head wound:"-

The words appeared, then faded to be replaced by two polygon figures, one wrapping the others head with a bandage.

He was then advised that any piece of clean fabric may be supplemented, as the 'video' came to an end.

The man just stood there for a moment, dumbfounded. He then sighed slowly and grabbed at his collar, attempting to use his shirt... only to find he was wearing a scarf.

That was convenient.

He removed it, folded it carefully, and then tied it tightly around his head, putting pressure on the wound. When he was satisfied, he grabbed his shirt and proceeded to thoroughly wipe his face with it.

His eyes burned, but when he was done the red tint was finally out of them.

And having treated his ailments, he then decided he was done with this place. Why had he been sealed in this concrete and metal tomb? Who knows. But there was nothing for him here now.

As he left, he noticed how thick the wall was... whatever had breached them must have been pretty significant he surmised. He also wondered why these walls were so overly thick. To keep things out... or to keep things in?

He continued out into the open, to turn and examine his 'home'.

It was a large, burned out and teetering skyscraper he realized with some horror.

He then noticed it wasn't really cloudy out. The night sky was filled with the smog of large scale fires. And he wasn't out in the open, he was standing in a crater, surrounded by partially destroyed building in a veritable wasteland.

Screaming could be heard in the distance, and bodies littered the area surrounding him.

… Was he in hell, he suddenly wondered.

"WHAT IS THIS?" he roared into the night air.

But there was no response.

Filled with frustrated rage, he grabbed up a rock... and flung it at a near by body. It struck it, but the body didn't flinch.

Growling with rage... he was a bit bent now... he raced over to the body.

"WAKE UP!" he ordered aggressively, turning him over.

"**GRAAAAHHHHHHHHH!**"

A deafening scream shook him to his core… but not from the very much dead body.

His swung around just in time to see a formation of lights screech across the sky like falling stars, a mere hundred feet above his head. They were as loud as fighter jets, and the ground shook in their wake.

The man stumbled to reclaim his bearings, only to notice one of the flybys had impacted through his home. The teetering tower was now a crumbling one, and it was coming straight for him!

What did he do? What could he do? He threw his arms up and screamed his last, as several tons of concrete hammered him into the earth.

* * *

><p>"Damn it!" Rillo growled, roaring into his scouter, "I went right through that building, Cap'n! Will you please settle on a landing site already? !"<p>

"Fine, fine." Captain Shroter sighed, "Men, commence landing sequence now!"

The five round space pods each came to a screeching halt in midair, only to fire straight down like bullets... right through a building.

When the dust settled, the five crafts sat neatly in a row, resting in their newly formed crater.

The far right pod opened first, and out leapt a lizard like creature with blue skin. He was very lanky, and wore full body armor, with shoulder plates.

"'Bout damn time!" he roared with unbridled enthusiasm, "Thought I was gonna meld to my damn chair!" he growled, stretching his back exaggeratedly, nearly touching his head to the back of his boots.

"These pods are too fucking small!" an amazonian woman with fiery red hair growled, lurching out of her pod. She wore similar armor.

"Quit your bitching." A gray skin humanoid with red eyes commanded them, stepping out of his pod. He wore a slightly different armor, with the edition of skirting plates, perhaps signifying seniority.

"That's easy for you to say Captain!" the lizard seethed, "You could probably stand in there if... you..." the lizard man slowed as he realized he was stepping onto thin ice.

"What was that Rata?" the waist high commander barked.

"Nothing sir!" Rata yelped.

"Good." Shroter said, as he swiveled, "Because I'll have you know I actually had the worst of it, I had to ride with the supplies!"

"What supplies?" Rillo asked, a red skinned humanoid with short white hair, still examining his ship for damage from it's earlier collision.

"Good question." Shroter commented, shoving a box of supplies from his ship into his arms. "Pass them out."

"Yes Cap'n."

"These are your laser guns!" Shroter explained to the men.

"You rode with laser pistols sir?" the red head questioned.

"Doubly sorry sir!" Rata exclaimed, as he received his.

"Noted." Shroter sighed.

"But sir..." the red head paused, receiving her weapon, "Why are we being given this weakling's crutch?"

"Glad you asked Ikumu." Shroter frowned, "Listen up men, we're late to the party so let me catch you up quick-"

"Wait," Rillo interrupted, "Goose is still in his pod!"

"What?" the Captain growled.

Low and behold, the far left pod remained intact.

"Get out here Goose!" he ordered, pounding on the ship.

"The door's jammed!" a gruff voice whined from the inside.

"Are you kidding me!" he roared back, glaring at the bulky cerulean skinned lizard-ish man inside.

"What do you want me to to do! I've been fiddling with the button like crazy, it won't work!"

The captain's aura ignited at that. His red eyes gleamed, and his arm shot into the pod, grabbed Goose, and flung him out, but all without harming the ship. He had 'ghosted' him out.

"... Thanks sir." Goose said carefully as he picked himself up, contorted his green hair, and Rillo shoved a gun into his hand.

"Alright then people, now let's get started shall we?" Shroter roared, "Our job here is to round up every single living creature on this planet with a power level in the triple digits, and then bring them to Lord Chiller-"

"What!" Goose exclaimed, "Since when are recruitment standards so low! ?" he kicked over a dead body at that point, "Does Chiller have a hard on for these midget Ikumu's or what?"

"Shut up Goose," Ikumu growled angrily, "Besides, if anything, they're albino Rillo's."

"How dare you!" Rillo seethed indignantly, "You'd have to be blind to think I look anything like these wankers!"

"Actually, all you pointy nose types look the same to me." Bata surmised.

"Shut up!" Shroter roared, "Our orders are set! We're to bring every C class bio unit into Chiller's camp ALIVE. As such, we're to use these guns to more easily separate the wheat from the chaff! These guns are special order, as such anyone who survives a shot is the a fore mentioned 'wheat'!"

"_Boy, the boss sure likes saying 'as such', doesn't he_?" Bata whispered to Rillo.

"_Shut up_!" Rillo whispered back.

"Got something to say Rillo?" the Captain roared, practically livid.

"Gah!" he gasped, shooting a glare at Bata, "No sir, sorry sir!"

"Good." he seethed, "ANYWAYS, just shoot someone! If they don't die, hit them with the net function!" he pointed to a button on the device, " As such, we'll then carry them to base! GET IT, GOT IT, GOOD! MOVE OUT!"

"YES SIR!" the group roared in unison, blasting off in different directions.

"This is why I'm #3 in this army." Shroter growled, head in hand. "Squad Shroter was supposed to be Chiller's right hand men, damn it! But no, they had to give me all the idiots!"

His scouter started blinking then, and he swiveled on his heal, only to be a greeted by a bunch of humans.

"What the hell! ?" he exclaimed, slightly surprised.

"Come on, little boy! We have to get you out of here before those bad men come back!" the lead human said, grabbing his hand.

"'Little boy'?" the captain seethed, as his aura kicked up again.

A scream sounded, soon to be drowned out by an explosion.

"Great, now I'm the first one to break the rules!" Shroter growled to himself.

He blasted off, still grumbling to himself.


	2. Chapter 2: The Hunt

**The Hunt**

* * *

><p>Two figures buzzed across the night sky, surveying the landscape.<p>

"Hey Rillo," the purplish lizard alien called, "Did you see how I blasted that guy? Right in the head! I'm probably the best shot in the entire force!"

"Quit followin' me, man." Rillo sighed.

"Too bad I'm too powerful to need these silly toys," Bata continued, ignoring him, "Being the best at something irrelevant, kind of like you and kissing ass eh?"

"Please quit following me." Rillo growled.

"You think if you're a really good pet today, boss Shroter might just give you a reach around tonight when he's banging your-"

"Quit followin' me! We're not friends, asshole!" Rillo roared.

"Ahh, come on!" Bata sighed, "Can't take a joke?"

"No, I can't take you!" Rillo growled, "You hang around me all the time, making dumb jokes and bragging about yourself. When did we become such good friends! ? Cause I don't remember agreeing to it!"

"What! Come on," he argued, " Jeice and Burter! You and me, is it hard to follow?"

"So being cloned from friends makes us friends? Then why don't you go hang out with Grudo, I believe Burter and Guldo got along too, after all."

"T- Shutup!" Bata sputtered.

"Go away." Rillo shot back, speeding away.

"Give me a break asshole, if I'm not your friend, who is?"

Rillo ignored him, fiddling with his scouter and trying to get back to work.

"What, Ikumu? She's a man hater. Hang out with her and she might mistake you for one, and that wouldn't do you no good." Bata continued.

"Why the hell is there so much life on this planet?" Rillo complained to himself.

"Or Goose? Dude's a cranky old burn out! Still pissed off he's not running his own crew anymore, if he'll hang out with you, it's only cause he wants to try giving you orders and pretend he's the boss."

"There's like a million pings on the radar. And the people are almost exactly the same as the animals, it's ridiculous!" Rillo growled, pocketing his gun and throwing out his hand.

"And I know you admire the boss's nuts, but trust me, it's not mutual, so it's either me or no-"

"Crusher shot!" Rillo growled, as an immense scatter shot blast rang out. Screams and squeals both human and animal rang out in response.

"Damn it man!" Bata exclaimed.

"Relax, there's no way the higher ups can watch all of us." Rillo grinned, "Besides, I kept my attack down. Still technically playing by the rules."

"Who cares," Bata growled, "Quit ignoring me! I'm making great jokes and you're off in la la land. It's rude, dude!"

"Alright, shut up for real," Rillo shushed him with a hand, "Looks like I got the first catch of the night!"

"Don't put your fucking hand in my face- wait, really?"

"Yep, right down there." Rillo grinned, blasting down.

"Yes, team purple does it again!" Bata cheered, racing after him.

"Jesus mate, can you just go and die somewhere, please?"

"What?"

* * *

><p>"GAAAHH!"<p>

The man screamed as he clawed his way out or a pile of rubble. His eyes scanned his horizon and he wheezed as he tried to catch himself.

He had woken up, in a box, and then walked outside, and then a building had fallen on him. He had imagined he would have either woken up in his bed, or in the clouds or something after that.

Instead, here he was, in a world of pain, clawing his way out of rubble.

This was real.

He stumbled and slipped, rolling down the rock pile into the mud. Great, just what his wounds needed.

He carefully picked himself up, amazed his injuries weren't so drastic to keep him from it. As much as he hurt, his body was surprisingly still in working order.

Astounding really, he should be dead.

… Or was he dead? In hell, suffering the tortures of some forgotten crime? The environment was certainly fitting, a true hell scape.

As he began trudging down the deserted and destroyed street, he wondered; had he been a bad man in his former life? And if he had been, why remove his memory? What was the point of punishment without self reflection, after all? This was just a crime in itself at this rate. Maybe at the end of this road he'd suffer a terrible death, and then remember everything? And then it would be like, 'now you know what your victims knew', or something. Or maybe he was just nuts.

And then, a beam of light crashed into his back.

"AAAH!" he screeched, lurching forward and collapsing. It burned like fire!

He shook like a seizure patient for a moment, as he waited for the pain to fade. When it did, he carefully rose, and very cautiously checked his back for injury.

He found, despite losing some fabric, he was fine. Again, a mystical survival.

He looked around, before bolting forward. He had no idea how his injury was incurred, he just knew he had no interest in having it happen again. But something else befell him soon enough.

"Stop there, long hair!" Something said, as it plowed him into the ground.

The man swiped at his back, but the red skinned creature jumped away far too quickly. The red man landed a few yards away... next to some blue man.

That settled it, he was crazy. But at the same time he was also a bit impressed he somehow knew red and blue were strange colors for people. Perhaps his memory wasn't as blank as it felt? But did that matter when he was being assaulted by freakish monsters?

"What the hell are you! ?" he cried.

"Well good question Mr. ... RR, we're angels!" the red man grinned deviously, "Come to take you before god!"

"Yeah, God is a giant headed lizard monster by the way!" the blue one joined in.

"Wh-what! Why'd you call me RR! ?" he demanded. Did these people know him?

"It's on your shirt." The red one answered, pointing.

The man looked down then, and spotted a red emblem. He also noticed a gun suddenly pressed into his chest. He looked up to see the red man had suddenly appeared right in front of him.

"Made ya look!" he grinned, as he blasted RR right in the chest, point blank. He flew backwards and crumbled into the dirt.

"Rillo! What the hell, why'd you do that! ?"

"The scouter's gettin nothing from him. I must have held back too much energy when I hit em."

"Urg." RR coughed, as he pulled himself off the ground. But he soon found himself completely immobile... too much pain.

"There, you see? Still alive, your scouter must be broken!" the blue man growled, stepping forward and fiddling with something attached to his head.

"Well?" 'Rillo' asked, after a pause.

"Nothing... not even a small reading. It's like he isn't even there." the blue ones' eyes suddenly bulged, "GGG-Ghost! ?"

"Shut up Bata you twit," Rillo sighed, continuing to fiddle with the device hooked to the side of his head, "Oh, I got it now! He's a robot!"

"What?" Bata growled, hitting some buttons, "I'll be damned. 101, talk about right on the level."

"What!" RR seethed, but was ignored. Why were they calling him a robot?

"I wouldn't get your hopes up, he doesn't count. It's not like we're dragging these weird ships off to Chiller after all," Rillo explained, motioning to a car, "And I bet they have an even higher power rating, too."

"No, come on!" Bata tried, "He's walking around, he looks human, and he's got a 100 power rating! It's perfect!"

"Why do you even care?"

"Be-because I bet Goose I'd be the first to bring in a catch, okay!" Bata seethed.

"Yeah, except I caught this one dumb ass."

"Ah come on, don't be like that. You really want me to have to buy that ass another ship? Help a brother out!"

"Listen mate, I know what Chiller really wants here, and it isn't some..." Rillo turned to RR, glancing him over, "Some... love doll, or whatever it is."

"Love doll?" RR croaked back.

"Well what are you then?" Rillo asked, walking over to him, "I think you're a might too smooth to be a battle droid."

"That's for sure, and honestly, your features are still a little too refined there at that, bub." Bata grinned, joining in, "More than likely, you're a _gay_ love doll."

"Fuck you, lizard freak!" RR growled.

"Well now that's strange Bata," Rillo said, "I thought you said we all look the same, so how did you arrive at that?"

"Easy, he looks like you!" Bata countered, before breaking into a full laugh.

"Right, 'spose I walked into that one." Rillo growled, pointing his gun at RR, "Let's wrap this up."

"Wait, no!" RR pleaded, but to no avail. Rillo pulled the trigger and RR was instantly covered in a thick, grasping fabric that shifted and fluxed and suddenly wrapped him tighter than a cigar.

He was collapsed into the fetal position, wrapped tightly into a cocoon he was incapable of freeing himself from. Soon, he felt himself hefted up by one of them. They were taking him somewhere.

"Don't mention that love doll stuff in front of Chiller," Bata whispered.

"No frickin duh, ya daft bastard." Rillo answered.

RR was left to wonder what he was in for, who this 'Chiller' was, and whether his name was even RR. He also spent a very small moment wondering if he was in fact a robot... a love doll even, before deciding being a denizen of hell was a far more appealing fate.


	3. Chapter 3: The Camp

**The Camp**

* * *

><p>"All bow before the great, all powerful, Lord Chiller!" an alien declared, stepping out of the very large saucer like space craft parked in the center of what was once North City.<p>

The tailed, and horned creature wore a full bodied fabric of a more civilian like style, unlike all the other aliens with their armor. But despite this, he carried an air of authority. Perhaps it was due to looking a lot like Frieza, the Frieza Dende remembered all to well from his former home on Namek.

More specifically, the form he wore when he annihilated his village. Though, a tad bluer in tint.

But to his surprise, or horror, he was only introducing the host of this new atrocity.

Because after every single freak and monster among this assembly of murderers bent at the hip, probably a thousand easy, the largest monster among them made his appearance. This, 'Lord Chiller'.

He had to duck slightly to get out of his own ship, he was so tall. And Dende immediately recognized his horrible visage, it was the third form the monster Frieza had donned. Only, if anything, this creature was taller and even more grotesque. His horns were black for instance, and his shell like patches were blood red.

He strode with purpose, his foot falls crackling the earth underneath him, to a throne that had been set up before hand. He sat lazily, and leaned on his elbow, resting his face in his palm.

Dende was speechless, beyond what the cretins who had captured him had instilled. The man looked bored. He just couldn't begin to understand it, these monsters were so used to killing it was just a chore at this point.

"At ease men." Chiller growled in a tone low enough to shake the earth, "What have you brought me?"

There seemed to be a dispute over who would bring their 'catch' to him first at that, but soon a couple nervous soldiers jumped up. They tore open their 'bag', and out plopped a understandably terrified dog man.

"Only humanoids, you twits!" another soldier scolded, suddenly appearing from behind Chiller.

It was Grudo, General Grudo. Dende knew him well, him and his men were the ones to capture him and Mr. Popo.

He was also reminiscent of someone from the Namek conflict... the strange green haired man who had killed one of his friends with just a kick, Zarbon... only this one had the edition of a second set of eye balls, one on either side of his head.

"But sir, we were told to bring anyone we could find with a power level above a 100, there was no specification made about race!"

"You dare put your failings on central command?" Grudo growled, "Treason!"

"No!" the two cried, before both soldiers and their catch were immediately blasted into little pieces.

"Next." Chiller called out, still bored.

At that, several dozen soldiers suddenly executed their catches, all at once.

"NOO!" Dende cried out, only to have a shin smash into his face.

"Keep quiet, wretch, we'll keep you alive." the purplish horned freak known as Aicho growled down to him.

Dende seethed in silence, like the thought of dieing would make him cry out! He had cried out for those poor souls, damn it... but it wasn't as if this psychopath would understand that. Though, he was glad to know Popo was safe, for now at least.

He looked across to him. They had nearly killed him, and he was left unconscious. Stuffed in one of those body bags they were catching people in. Dende could only sense him to know he was still alive. He wondered what the chances were they would let him live, after they figured out they didn't need him for the dragon balls. That strange man Grudo had somehow looked into his mind... but at least he hadn't gleaned that, yet.

Speaking of which, another set of aliens were holding another bag a bit away.

"Hey Bata, want to cut our losses too?" an alien asked off to the side.

"No, come on! He still counts, still technically a humanoid. Besides, we're officers! They wouldn't dare give us the same treatment."

"Oh I see, Goose still has his catch, huh?"

"How'd that old moron get so damn lucky? I'm not buying him a freaking thing, have you priced those ships? It's ridiculous!"

"Death is probably more costly."

"Shut up!"

"Fine, but he's your catch okay?" the red one said, pushing the bag off on him, before quickly backing away.

"Oh, so **now** he's my catch? Freaking wimp, what kind of friend are you? !"

"We're not friends!"

Dende frowned. He knew why they were keeping him and Popo alive, the dragon balls... but who else would they possibly think was worth keeping? Some kind of semi humanoid... he couldn't sense anything though, they must have beat whoever it was to death.

The next candidate was brought before Chiller in the mean time... only this time he was stripped. After which Chiller growled 'Next' as Grudo executed the subject.

"What the hell is this about!" Dende growled up to his captors.

"Who told you you could talk?" Aicho growled, raising his foot to kick him again.

"Hold up chief," a long headed purple alien beside him said, "What's the harm? Maybe he even knows something?"

"Apple, shut up." Aicho stated.

"Ahh come on, we could be here for awhile. Might as well get some work done."

Aicho stared at him coldly at that.

"Now that's the spirit!" Apple grinned, purposefully misinterpreting him. He bent down to Dende at that, "We're looking for saiyans! Know any?"

Dende stared back, dumbfounded. This was a revenge mission? He could understand them coming for the dragon balls, not how they knew they were here though. But to come here just to settle a grudge from over 200 years ago? They were cowards... who would wait this long? They must have known Goku and friends were long gone now, yet they hoped to find some distant descendant just to impose some kind of removed and undeserved vengeance? It made him sick.

"Ooh, look at his face!" Apple squealed, "I thing he knows what I'm talking about."

Aicho seemed to snap at that. He slammed an arm against Dende's back and hauled him up.

"WHERE ARE THE SAIYANS! ?" he roared into the Namekian's face.

"Relax, man, we need him alive!" Apple chipped in weakly.

"ANSWER ME!" Aicho bellowed, ignoring him.

Dende frowned. A screaming madman was not the same threat to him as it had been when he was a child. In fact, getting inadvertently killed by one of these morons would be the best thing that could happen now, if only to prevent the use of the dragon balls.

"How about you make me, you purple freak."

Aicho's eyes went red at that, in an instant he drew his fist back. Apple dived for him, but he was batted away like a baseball. This looked like the end.

"Jeeze, you're emotional." Grudo sighed, from afar.

Aicho seemed frozen in place for a moment, his eyes blank. Then, letting his fist down, he started to approach the general in a daze, Dende in hand.

"What's this now?" Chiller grumbled.

"This, this is a Namekian!" Grudo announced proudly.

"Wait a minute!" the Icejin that had introduced Chiller called, suddenly running up, "Are you sure?"

"What?" Grudo growled, as he lashed out his arm towards the alien, "Know your place!"

"Holy shit! Yes!" Bata gleamed to himself, from the crowd.

"Gaaargh!" Grudo seethed, nursing a bleeding stomach wound, "W-... Why! ?"

"Know **your **place." Chiller seethed, still in his chair, the tip of his tail still now slick with blood, "Even the lowliest Icejin is miles upon miles above you."

"Lord Chiller..." Grudo seethed, before dropping to his knees, "I apologize!"

"Fine, but before you slink off to the recovery chamber, elaborate on this find of yours." Chiller grinned.

"But... y-yes sir." Grudo said weakly, rising back up, "We found this green man on that strange tower over in sector D... I believe he's a Namekian, like the ones in the old stories... I probed his mind, and I firmly believe there are dragon balls... on this planet."

"That's wonderful news," the other Icejin beamed, "We should take steps immediately to secure them!"

"Ma-.. may I leave now sir?" Grudo begged, nearly starting to wobble on his legs.

"Fine."

"Oh... thanks..." Grudo replied, stumbling off. Aicho suddenly dropped Dende at that and grabbed his head, as if suddenly taken my a migraine. Suddenly free, Dende scrambled to his feet and faced Chiller.

"You'll never get your wish!" Dende roared, as he drove his hand into his own guts.

The pain was incredible, but he was sure of his action. When he saw the gleam in this new monster's eyes at the mention of the dragon balls, for a moment it had been as if he was back on Namek. Every bit of peace and justice he had known here had suddenly faded away, just from that. He was prepared to die rather than ever see that horror become reality again, well prepared.

"How annoying," the unnamed Icejin groaned, removing a gun from his back pocket, "This could have been handled civilly."

"Civilly? You killers, you're all the same," Dende grinned, "All mentally deficient."

"I'd like to think we have moments of clarity, like right now," the Icejin gleamed, firing on him.

...

"Hmm... is he alive, Ica?" Chiller asked, looking over the body.

"Sure is, and he'll be stable for as long as we want him." Ica grinned, putting his gun away, "Frozen solid. I was planning on doing this to whatever saiyans we found. But now, we can look for the dragon balls with no fear of our wish getting nullified, like what happened to Frieza on Namek."

"Put him on ice." Chiller growled to some minions, who quickly dragged him off, "Now, next!"

Aicho seemed to have regained himself at this point, and quickly ran off. Meanwhile, Bata, swallowing his nervousness, picked up his catch and approached the emperor.

"This is my offering, lord Chiller," he announced, tearing open the bag and pouring 'RR' out before him, "Notice he has black hair! Just like the saiyans who beat-" Bata suddenly stopped himself, noticing Chiller's wicked glare.

"Beat?" he asked ominously.

"I mean, cowardly poisoned Lord Frieza and King Cold, of course!" Bata choked out. If he would stab Grudo over slapping the wrong minion, Bata had little confidence he was above death for an annoyance.

"Is that so?" Chiller growled, looking down at the creature, "Does it have a tail?"

Before Bata could answer, two other minions jumped out and stripped the creature.

"No, no sir."

"Ha, is this one even within the parameters?" Chilled growled, "It looks scrawny as hell."

At that, Ica presented him a scouter, much to Bata's horror. He pressed a few buttons on it and frowned.

"He's so weak, I'm not even getting a reading." Chiller's eyes sharpened.

"T-t-t-t-try the machine function!" Bata managed to sputter out frantically.

"It's a machine?" Chiller growled.

"I-I-I thought maybe he would still be of interest sir!" Bata dropped to his knees, "Please have mercy!"

"You worthless-"

"What the hell is this?" RR growled.

It was as if all sound had disappeared in that instance. Everybody was literally shocked someone, anyone, had tried to talk over Lord Chiller.

"I wake up, and you freaks grab me and put me in a bag like I was a stray cat!" RR seethed, "What is this hell? I want to know, damn it!"

"I'm sorry sir! I'll dispose of this trash right away and find those saiyans-"

"Don't bother." Chiller sighed, flicking his tail.

"GAHH! NO!" Bata screamed, dropping into the fetal position and cradling his head... only to peak up just in time to watch RR's body go sailing off into the distance. Was he spared? Better lay on the ass kissing again just in case, he thought. "OH, uh, thank you so much Lord Chiller, and I'll get right back to work right now! I promise I'll be the first to get you a saiyan so... bye!"

Chiller was staring off into the distance, so engrossed he didn't really react to Bata, as he bolted off.

"Yeah... yeah... next..." Chiller frowned.

"_Sir, you really should have executed him_!" Ica whispered.

"What? Oh, yeah I guess." he responded, seeming to drop out of deep thought.

"... What's with you, this too boring all of a sudden?" Ica asked worriedly.

"No... It's just that.." Chiller frowned again, "I was trying to smash that machine thing to pieces... but instead it fired away in one piece... that's not right."

"What?" Ica frowned.

"I'm probably just getting rusty." Chiller groaned, tiredly.


	4. Chapter 4: The Frog

**The Frog**

* * *

><p>Chiller rose from his throne, as the last captive had been brought before him, been scrutinized, then blasted into non existence. No saiyans were found. But he appeared optimistic, a different prize capturing his imagination.<p>

"Listen men, as it stands, the first one to find me a saiyan gets a promotion,"

Cheering whipped up at that.

"But now, we have another goal," Chiller smiled, "Find me the dragon balls! Interrogate any being you find! Any one who brings me one of these seven golden, red starred spheres will also be promoted up a full rank, no exceptions!"

The cheering went up several decibels at that.

"Move out!" he roared, as thousands of soldiers blazed out like a hive of excited bees, each trying to beat each other to the prize.

Many, many people were about to die.

* * *

><p>Far away, and to the west, a small pond enclosed in an arboretum sat relatively undisturbed. It's inhabitants carrying on with their lives. Save two little frogs, who appeared to be on a journey.<p>

{Hey dad, where are we going?} the little frog asked, as the larger one led it away from the pond and the rest of the frogs.

{Well Junior, I believe I've told you that every few years, a new leader of the village must be chosen, right?}

{Wait! But that's not unless the old chief dies! You're too young to die, dad!} the young frog cried.

{True, usually this happens when the chief is older... but my leg is really annoying me. That bitch housekeeper stepped on it a year ago and it's bothered me ever since!}

{Wh-What! ? Dad, that's no reason to die!}

{What? Oh, no, listen... just come with me, everything will be clear pretty soon.} the older frog groaned, picking up the pace.

{No dad! I'm not ready for this, nor am I willing to see you die!} the young frog cried, halting in place.

{For goodness sake!} the frog groaned, head in hand, {Fine! We'll do it here, big baby. I was really hoping to get farther away, but whatever.}

{What! ? Do what, dad?} the little frog questioned, worried.

{It'll all be clear soon,} the older frog grinned, bringing his little green arms up to the side of his head, {Change, n-!}

A blast of light suddenly illuminated the room.

{What the hell was that?} the older frog whispered, looking out the window of the arboretum.

{Dad! I'm scared!}

{Hold up, dummy, we're not done yet!} the older frog growled, but the younger frog had already started hopping back to the pond.

The older frog gave chase, until something made every window of the arboretum shatter.

{What... was that what I think it was?} the older frog seethed to himself, staring out at the horizon, as a figure blasted around in the distance. Firing down energy and destroying things.

{No... way!} the older frog thought, jumping towards the edge of the arboretum housing.

{Dad! What the hell are you doing! ? We need to get back to the pond!} the little frog croaked back to him, halfway back himself.

{Yes! What a beautiful sight!} the amphibian thought to himself, leaping happily out of the structure. There were soldiers in the distance... and their armor, though different in color and style, was definitely familiar to him. But those beautiful things attached to their heads, they were unmistakable!

{Dad! Come back!}

{You're chief now, son! Goodbye forever!} the frog waved to his son, before launching away, full speed. He never looked back.

* * *

><p>"I'm not gonna ask again," the german-shepherd like dog man looking alien growled, hoisting a woman up and aiming his gun at another one of the hostages his partner was holding captive, "Where are the dragon balls and saiyans! ?"<p>

"I have no idea what you're talking about! Are those even real things or you just demented! ?" she cried back, at the end of her rope.

"Not good enough," he growled, blasting another person away.

"Noo!" she cried, as the rest of the survivors collectively whimpered.

"I'm starting to think they really don't know, Spike." the partner offered, a pit bull like dog alien.

"So what Rex, we just kill em all?"

"No! Don't! Please! I'll do anything!" the crowd collectively begged.

Spike shrugged.

"Alright, one more time, WHERE ARE THE DRAGON BALLS, AND WHERE ARE THE SAIYANS! ?" he roared into the woman's face, as he aimed the gun into the crowd again.

"Just cause you say it louder, doesn't mean I understand it any better!" she cried.

"Fail!" he barked, yet again blasting another innocent to smithereens.

"Why! Just describe them at least! What is the point of this? We're all gonna die for not knowing alien lingo!" the crowd whined out.

"Damn it! There's only seven dragon balls, and three saiyans! If we don't get a move on, neither of us will get the prize!" Rex complained.

"But these humans are so tough to break though! They must love these damn saiyans to hell and back to protect them with their lives!"

"I don't even know what a saiyan is!" the girl yelled.

"Don't lie to me!"

"At least give up the dragon balls!" the pit bull persuaded, "They're things for god sake! Aren't your lives more important than things?"

"Just, please just, just," the woman began to cry, "Just stop being so... so stupid!"

"Stupid! ?" the Spike growled, as he flung her into the stratosphere.

"Darn it Spike, she was the only one with black hair! The only one that could have been a saiyan!" Rex growled, "Now this whole lot is worthless."

He blasted away the rest of their human captives at that.

"Guess we'll just have to get a new batch," Spike growled, "I wish I knew what these damn monkey people smelled like though, it be a lot more helpful than 'bad hair cuts and tails'."

"Guess we'll just have to make do," Rex groaned stepping forward, only to stop as a frog jumped out in front of him, "Wait, what's this?"

Normally, something like this wouldn't be enough to deter him, but this frog was making a bunch of crazy gestures, almost like it was sentient.

"Hey Spike, check out this crazy frog! It's like he's trying to communicate!"

The other dog man raised an eyebrow, than scrutinized it carefully.

"Rex, I think... he's making fun of you!" Spike exclaimed.

The frog looked at him incredulously.

"What? … You're right! Look at that! He's saying I'm a clown or something!" Rex sputtered with rage, jumping to conclusions, "I'm gonna kill him!"

The frog continued to make an 'x' with his arms and shake his head 'no' with a passion, throughout this line of thought.

"Wait a minute Rex," Spike roared, throwing an arm out in front of his partner dramatically, "Let's see what the scouter says about his power level!"

"What! ?" Rex seethed.

"We don't know what we're dealing with here! Maybe he's not just talk?"

"... Good thinking!" Rex growled worriedly, eying the amphibian. To go this far to insult him... the balls on this frog.

"Oh, my, god." Spike said, taking his scouter off.

"WHAT! WHAT! What's it say?"

Spike turned to him slowly, his face frozen in fear.

"It's over 9 thousandths!"

"NO WAY!" Rex seized, falling backwards and grabbing at his chest, "NO WAY!"

"Gah ha ha ah ah ahaha hah!" Spike began cackling like a nut at that, dropping his scouter as a laughing fit over took him.

"Wh- why are you laughing! ?" Rex demanded, as he stared terrified at the frog.

"It's thousandths, thousand-**ths**!" Spike managed to sputter, despite his continued laughing, "To be exact, it's power level is exactly 0.01, sir!"

"Why you first class ass hole, I outta kill you!" Rex growled, jumping back to his feet.

"Ah come on, it was just a joke boss!" Spike whimpered.

"Boss, eh?" an unfamiliar voice asked, "So I'm to assume you're the superior officer?"

Both dog-aliens froze in place at that.

"... Who's talking?" Rex growled, looking around, "This another gag, Spike?"

"No!" he defended, looking around too.

"Cause I really will kill you if it is!" Rex warned, raising his fist.

"Wait!" Spike yelped, "Is... is that frog wearing a scouter?"

"I'm sorry, mister dog, but as a superior officer in this man's army, I'm going to have to commandeer that vessel." Captain Ginyu grinned fully.

It was to be his final expression, as a frog.


	5. Chapter 5: The Genie

**The Genie**

* * *

><p>"Wake up!" Apple yelled, as he slammed his fist against the recovery chamber inside Chiller's main ship. His head still hurt like hell from where Aicho had hit him, and he was in a bit of a panic.<p>

Around the fourth smack, Grudo snapped awake, and the liquid that filled the chamber then automatically drained out. Apple stepped back respectfully, as the door rose and the general stepped out.

"Apple, new uniform." Grudo ordered, examining the hole in the side of his armor from where Chiller had stabbed him. No matter what, he valued conduct and appearance over all else.

"Sir ther-" Apple started, hurriedly.

"That was an order." Grudo snapped. He was in no mood for impudence. Apple groaned and rushed away, only to return immediately and toss the chest piece at his boss.

"Alright, what's with this attitude, do you suddenly feel suicidal?" Grudo growled, as he removed his old chest piece and flung it at his subordinate.

"Ow! I-... I'm sorry sir, it's just urgent you know! ?" Apple exclaimed.

Grudo shot him a glare at that. He was not use to this insubordination, and he was feeling especially moody after getting embarrassed in front of the entire army.

If Apple wasn't the only officer he'd ever been assigned that hadn't tried to transfer out of his squad, he wouldn't hesitate to kill him right now. But as it was, he only had him and that stupid Aicho, and none of the other squad leaders wanted that lunatic so he had just been stuck with him. If it wasn't for Apple, his position as general would basically be a farce, more like baby sitter to the elite force's rabid dog. So, with that in mind,, he decided to humor his excitable lap dog.

"Alright, what is it?" Grudo sighed, as he examining his side. He had a new scar, and it was very depressing to him, being a narcissist.

"Sir, the shit has officially hit the fan!" Apple roared, "Aicho has gone awol, Chiller has extended the promotion deal to anyone who finds a dragon ball-"

"What! ?" Grudo seethed, "He wouldn't!"

Promotions meant trouble for him, he was already only barely maintaining his standing as general, or second in command under Chiller. The right number of promotions, almost anyone could take his job. Their might be a question of power, but the Icejin cronies had the technology to boost people's power levels. That's how he himself had come into this power and position after all. If he was replaced, he might have to serve as a subordinate, but it was much more likely he'd be executed to keep the chain of command clear, and also to keep the overall military strength under Chiller manageable. Those Icejin were a shifty and devious lot, for sure.

"Sir, that's not even the worst of it!" Apple seethed, "Squad Kiwi is coming here!"

"Why the hell would Chiller put all three of us on this planet! ?" Grudo seethed back, "Does he want us to kill each other! ?"

"I believe Chiller wants as many hands on the job as possible now that the dragon balls are in play," Apple shrugged, "Reserve units are arriving too. But you know if Kiwi gets here, we're probably gonna have a blood bath on our hands."

Grudo glared through his subordinate, angry enough to kill him outright. But he soon breathed deeply and reminded himself Apple was only the messenger. He had to focus.

"Come." Grudo suddenly snapped, as he slipped on his armor and rushed out of the ship. And Apple was soon on his heel.

Kiwi, or Colonel Kiwi as the moron was called, was the bane of Grudo's existence. Though weaker than him, his squad was far superior. His four man team was exceptionally loyal, balanced, and each member was nearly strong enough to run their own crew. Not to mention, each of them had a special ability that raised them beyond mere soldiers. Whereas Grudo only had a weak yes man and a powerful man child backing him up.

It was not hard to imagine that Kiwi might try and assassinate him given the situation. With his men backing him up, he was certainly capable. And certainly willing, there was no one in the army that wouldn't kill to be general. That's why if it came to that, he had to have his men ready to back him up. So he immediately booted up his scouter and began his search for Aicho.

"Why did he run off?" Grudo asked.

"Who knows, the freak knocked me out. I only woke up in time to hear Chiller's new deal, and find out about Kiwi."

"You mean I was unguarded in that recovery chamber! ?" Grudo seethed. Any elite could have taken him out in that predicament, he had been positively helpless.

"Sorry sir, but I really couldn't help it!" Kiwi cried, "Aicho has over triple my power level, after all! I'm lucky he didn't kill me!"

"Keep reminding me how useless you are," Grudo seethed, to which the smaller soldier clammed up. He could only thank his lucky stars Shroter wasn't as devious as Kiwi, or he would be dead already. But he couldn't think of that now, he had to regroup his team.

Where was that monster? Grudo wondered to himself, as he fiddled with his scouter. Aicho's power level was pretty high, he should be easy to find...

Suddenly he stopped as he remembered something.

"Where's the Namekian and Genie!" Grudo roared.

"Oh, ugh, Chiller had the namekian frozen to keep him from killing himself..."

"Then where's the fat one!" Grudo seethed. It was their one ace in this dragon ball hunt. Grudo had merely passed over the man's thoughts, but he was positive there were leads on them buried in there. And with the namekian in cold storage, he really was their last hope.

Apple looked near to tears, he lifted his hand defensively.

"Sir I'm sorry!... But I have no idea!"

That was the last straw. Grudo grabbed him by the neck at that. This had been his mistake. He had hired this weakling because he had valued servitude over ability. His ego had led him to ruin, all on the shoulders of this pathetic brown noser.

"_Sir... please... you need... me...!_" Apple managed to croak.

"Why? You're not even strong enough to be used as a distraction." Grudo seethed, as he broke his neck.

He flung the body at the ship, which it splattered against ungracefully. Then he went back to typing into his scouter, trying to find the coordinates on his other teammate. Aicho may be a raving, bull headed moron, but he was also the second strongest soldier in all of Chiller's army. And wouldn't you know it? He was incredibly perceptible to a little psychic persuasion.

After finding an appropriately high reading, Grudo blasted off, knowing he needed to find Aicho to stand any chance against Kiwi and his men. The dragon balls would have to wait... for now.

* * *

><p>"Wake up!" Popo cried, rustling the body. But it wouldn't move. Was he dead? He was covered in blood and numerous injuries, wasn't breathing, and he had no power level to speak of. But in this case, that wasn't decisive evidence of death.<p>

Popo had recognized this man, while he had been trapped by those aliens. He had regained consciousness about the same time Dende had been...

Popo wiped a tear away. He had been unable to help, that's why it came to that. And even so, Dende's sacrifice had been in vain. It was truly dire times.

But that's why he needed this man. He was an android, Popo knew, and a powerful one at that. He could defeat this Chiller easily and right this whole situation, if only he was still alive!

Popo looked over his body, that if was a pretty big if. He imagined the android must be pretty out of it if he had allowed himself to be beaten so easily, maybe he was broken inside? Being mostly a machine, the genie had no way of helping him if that was the case.

The genie thought long and hard about his other options, before laying his hands on the man again, a grave look painting his face. A light shone from his hands, as the nude man was soon covered in a familiar orange gi. This guy had never really been what you would call good... hopefully looking like a hero might help him to act like one, if he was to function again at all that is.

Popo hefted the body over his shoulder and summoned his flying carpet. He would try for Korin's place, and hope for the sake of the planet they weren't intercepted along the way.


End file.
